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I see it's a rendition of a previously written poem, so I hope your mindset and way of looking at love and loss differently. This hits me right in the heart and makes me hate you ever so slightly... Mostly it's confusion, but a little frustration. I mean--why would someone do that? It just sounds corrupt and not a very ideal or mature way to handle the situation. Honestly, it seems more like an immature 12-year-old trying to make everything work out for him.
Though this poem may not be true, it sure has ruffled a few feathers! It really rubbed me the wrong way. I really hope that's really not how you think because that's self-destructive and borderline sociopathic. Just--just no, man. Don't say things like that. Also, don't think I'm flaming you, it's just a very touchy situation...
As for the poem, I can't say it's well written or not. It's very back-and-forth and confusing to the reader. I don't say many people can relate to this. Not only that, but you seem to contradict yourself a little...maybe you're feeling ambivalent, though not portrayed well at all; you don't give two feelings without a "but" in between it. Actually, it's hard to find your emotion in it at all.
That ambivalence brings us to mood, or rather lack of. Your mood is hard to decifer, so it's difficult to connect with what you're saying. You don't seem to be very sorry about it, but more matter-of-fact. You're just stating fact after fact and not caring for the subject matter though you claim to. Again, sociopathic XD. It's just...a very difficult poem to unfold and not in a good "oh how mysterious," etc etc.
Even so, you are really good at bringing about an interesting, contraversial subject. Drawing the reader's emotions you're good at, which is really interesting since you're not good at displaying your own. I'd say that's the only thing you need to work on...your mood, tone, and word-choice. They all kinda go hand-in-hand, though, so no worries!
Best of luck. ^^